Where Sunshine Meets Rain
Optimism runs deep within me. Combining a family history of mental health, a global pandemic and the unending connection to news outlets around the world, sometimes the only option is to find a way to see the glass half full.
I remember after my first season with the Athletics, a co-worker mentioned to me that all I ever saw in the world was “sunshine and rainbows”. I couldn’t argue with him because I have spent the majority of my time looking for positivity in and around my life.
Optimism has brought me hope and excitement on a daily basis. It’s something that I nurture and actively seek out. When I’m training with someone, I find that providing optimism can be one of the most valuable resources to their training program. Life is hard, exercising is hard. Optimism can keep us going.
I’m going to take off the rose colored glasses for a second and talk about two challenges that face optimism. This applies to those I work with professionally and also among my family and friends group. Heck, I’d even say these apply to myself as well.
Mental Health
I remember being a year into my professional career, moving back home to Vermont to live with my parents. The first gym I had worked at had gone bankrupt on a moment’s notice, my second job I had quit due to a significant event that showed me what misogynistic behavior really looked like and my third job had landed me an annual salary of $6,000... It was safe to assume at that point I felt like a failure.
Moving home, I landed a job in my hometown that gave me a solid salary and benefits, some good honest work that was teaching me something in the dietetics world, along with applied exercise physiology. Plus, I was living at home getting to know my parents again. Rose colored glasses, back on.
Then came the phone call that ended my contract at my employer and left me back at square one, personal training on an hourly basis. If you are a trainer or know someone who is a personal trainer, you may know this feeling of hopelessness. I knew the only way I was going to make money was to fill my schedule, train around the clock and forget my basic human needs.
So I looked elsewhere. Notably, I went and got my real estate license less than two weeks after that phone call and immediately jumped into selling houses, or trying to at least.
These drastic moves within my professional life were leaving me drained at both ends of the day. I felt hopeless in my pursuit of a stable job and a fun work environment. So I signed up for an IRONMAN.
Why?
I needed a space to go where there were no expectations, no questions from family or friends and no pressure. Signing up for a 2.4 mile swim, a 112 mile bike ride and a 26.2 mile run all in the same day was something that seemed so drastic and out of reach that I couldn’t assign a realistic possibility to it. It was something that I could just do and try and be without fear.
That IRONMAN saved my career.
With real estate being what real estate is to a first year agent, my personal training schedule full but not quite full enough to make any legitimate money and still living at home with my parents, those 4 hour bike rides, long runs and days in the swimming pool kept me sane and more importantly, kept me present.
When things get tough, I find it wildly difficult to really exist in the present moment. I don’t want to. I want to be where I’ve been or where I’m going. Why wait and feel what it feels to be in the here and now?
The IRONMAN taught me that when I was forced to be in the moment, when I was brought to within minutes of total exhaustion, I could find what made the present something to live for. The feeling of burning lungs climbing a hill on the bike or the wind whipping my face as I sped down a hill. The cold embrace of another long swim turned to heat and freedom in the water. By living in the moment, I could realize how moments of pain and discomfort often turned to feelings of exuberance or celebration. Why couldn’t the same be applied long term?
I’ve worked with many people who have struggled with mental health. What I’ve found to be valuable is providing a space for them to be present. For them to enjoy a moment and truly live in it. It is not a cure for mental health, but it is a recipe for some happiness, some hope and a little bit of that optimism.
Body Image
This one is a winding road. I haven’t come across many trainers in my life that have avoided the pitfalls of a negative body image. In health and fitness, the sad truth is that many people look at “walking the walk” as a way to determine who knows what they’re talking about.
Many folks gravitate to the health and fitness field due to a love of working out. From my experience, this working out led to improved self-confidence and capability at some point in their lives. If someone adheres to the “if some is good, more is better” mentality, negative body image is an easy, slippery slope to go down. If 20% body fat has folks saying “wow you look great!”, what would 15% cause people to say?
Going into my Junior year of college, I was an undeclared, twice transferred college kid without a clue of where I was going or what I wanted. During the summer, my best friend inspired me to start watching what I ate, cutting out booze and lifting weights instead of binge-eating watching movies. At the 30,000 foot view, it led to some good things.
My body weight dwindled by over 50 pounds. At six feet tall, I was in the single digits for body fat percentage. By far, the leanest and meanest that I’ve ever been.
It wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows though. I binge ate. At times, to the point of making myself sick. Weeks of protein laden, broccoli stuffed meals led to weekends of pizza, cheesecake and anything in between. Being male and a practicing athlete, I was able to shrug it off. In hindsight, I was dealing with a heck of a negative self-image.
Since starting in the personal training space, it’s clear that many of us struggle with body image. Working out is looked upon as an “answer” for these kinds of struggles. It’s not.
It is, however, a way to have some objectivity. For me, I know that my body doesn’t feel good above a certain body fat percentage. It makes my joints hurt more than usual and I struggle to have good energy. For that reason, I try to stay below that figure. Is it body image? Not sure… but at least it’s actionable.
For those that I work with, the majority are beautiful, strong people who train to be capable and confident. It makes me happy when I see someone truly loving their body and their ability to live life.
There are plenty who struggle with body image and self-confidence. For those of you who may fall into this category, you are not alone. In my experience, there’s a good chance that you’re a strong, capable human being who simply wants to be the best version of yourself. There’s nothing wrong with that! Just know that the current version of yourself gives you so much to be thankful for already! Enjoy the journey!
If you want to chase that six pack, rock on. You don’t need it to be beautiful. It is kind of cool though...